Training in Sensitivity
by chronicxxinsanity
Summary: Some simple training in sensitivity turns into more than just understanding and feeling basic emotions. With the help of his teammate, Sai makes it his latest mission to learn to be sensitive, and realizes why he wants to learn it in the first place. All of this brings Sai to some of the most unusual feelings that he never knew existed; some wonderful, and some horrible.


**Training in Sensitivity**

Chapter One

Sensitivity seemed to come so naturally to human beings. So it would only follow that Sai felt less like a human being when he continuously failed at being sensitive. Or, in better terms, was punched so hard that he landed flat on his ass and skidded halfway to Suna. He couldn't put his finger on what he felt like, exactly, but it was something decidedly less-real. Something sub-human. Whatever it was, it didn't feel nice and it put an uncomfortable knot in his chest that he also couldn't describe.

The latest time that Sakura had punched his jaw – effectively splitting his lip and causing the entire lower side of his face to swell in a matter of seconds – she had sighed in what he was only able to describe as defeat. Her hard, angered gaze softened when he made no move to leave the training ground and she had grabbed his chin and tilted his head in a manner that was unusual for Sakura; gentle.

She moved his face this way and that before softly pressing a glowing green hand to his jaw. It tingled and tickled, but Sai didn't move or mention it. He had learned that staying completely still and silent was often the best way to not get injured further. So, while he wasn't allowing himself to move or speak, he inspected his pink-haired partner. She was close. Close enough for him to see the sweat and dirt that covered her skin from their training session.

This was unusual. After making an "insensitive" comment about her legs (or more accurately, the size of her thighs), Sai was usually left to hobble to the hospital where someone else would piece him back together. That, or she would shriek in irritation and leave him to the inferior-medical-attention of Naruto or Yamato if they were on a mission.

In a way, he almost preferred the latter. The stoic medics would ask in a detached manner what happened, fix him, and then send him on his way. It was something he was used to from as far back as he can remember; the lack of attachment or interest. Sometimes Sakura would ask if the previously-injured body-parts were alright in a guilty-fashion, but usually she would ignore it and they would go back to the normal dynamic that had formed between them.

It had taken him months to figure out what that certain expression that she was wearing now meant, and he was able to pinpoint exactly what Sakura was feeling; pity. But pity for him? He still didn't understand enough about pity to be able to tell by her eyes and the set of her jaw alone.

Her fingers moved over the previously bruised skin to study her work, but instead of nodding and deeming him "healed", her eyes lingered on him for a moment. She suddenly let out a sigh and took a step back, taking Sai by surprise for a second time by breaking their little tradition of hurting, then healing him, then nodding and acting as if nothing had happened.

"I'm sorry; it's really not your fault." Her voice was softer, and after a moment of thinking Sai realized it was filled with guilt.

He wasn't sure how to respond to that, so he didn't.

What wasn't his fault? Why was she sorry? For hitting him in the first place or healing him afterward? In his experience, asking questions or talking too much when Sakura looked decidedly vulnerable and guilty normally lead to another punch in the gut or a more painful kick to some lower region. So instead, he watched as Sakura took a second glance at his jaw.

"I guess I keep forgetting that you weren't taught these things. They just seem so…I don't know," Sakura finished in a sigh, letting her small hand drop from his face. She turned to grab the few kunai that had been scattered throughout the training ground.

"May I ask what things you're talking about?" Sai asked, retrieving the short tanto that he had dropped in an attempt to evade one of Sakura's more aggressive attacks. He thought about giving her a "compliment", something Yamato suggested that he claimed would help calm any kunoichi's wrath, and the words were on the tip of his tongue...it just didn't feel natural. She must know that she was improving, so Sai swallowed what could have been a horrible attempt at a compliment and kicked over a piece of upturned earth so that the grass faced up once again.

Sakura stood up and stuffed a handful of shuriken into her hip pouch, taking a long breath and looking towards the sky. "I guess understanding emotions. You're getting better, but well," she hesitated for a moment and gave him a calculating stare, "you still don't understand completely."

"Can you explain it to me?" Sai adjusted the strap that held the small sword to his back and turned to face Sakura, who had finished picking up her own small amount of weapons.

She let out an unfeminine snort (that Sai knew now not to mention) and turned to give him a cheeky smile where one side of her mouth was drawn up a little more than the other, showing off a sharp K9 tooth. "Sai, there aren't enough hours in the day."

And with that, she walked away.

After years, Sai was now able to cope with some of the emotions of others, and was even able to understand some of his own, but there were the smaller things that everyone around him just seemed to _know_. It was a natural part of who they were, how they interacted, and how they bonded. Sai didn't have the natural understanding that everyone else seemed to have – perhaps that was why he had seen the brief look of pity on Sakura's face – but that wouldn't stop him from trying. Perhaps, after some more work, he would be able to pass as a normal human-being.

But to make that happen, Sai would need some help.

He set off at a quick jog to catch up with Sakura, who had already made it past three of the other training fields while Sai had been deep in thought.

"Sakura," he called out. She turned her head to look over her shoulder, raising an eyebrow in an inviting manner but she didn't completely stop. He caught up to her and matched her pace easily. "I would like your help, if you're willing."

"What kind?" she asked. Her voice was a little edgy and she seemed to be watching him warily out of the corner of her brightly-colored eye.

"You said that I do not understand emotions completely."

"I said you're getting better," she corrected, pulling her pink hair out of the ponytail it was in so that the slightly dirty strands framed her heart-shaped face.

"But I'm not…I still need help," he hesitated and went a different direction. If her reaction to him the last time he mentioned how less-than-human he felt was any indication, it was not a subject that should be brought up.

"What with? Specifically."

Sai thought for a moment. "I've heard you say on many occasions that I am insensitive, and do not understand one's sensitivity or how to be sensitive." Sakura stared straight ahead, but her eyes lowered a fraction of an inch; guilt. She felt guilty for saying that? "I can now understand several emotions, but sensitivity is not one of them." At this, the corners of her mouth twitched up in what could have been a smile she was trying to hold back. That, or a grimace.

"How do you want me to help?" That was a good sign, Sai decided. She hadn't shot him down completely like she did when Naruto would ask her to go to dinner without the rest of the team.

"I'm not sure," Sai said after a long pause. "I want to be able to be sensitive and understand why you want me to be."

Sakura nodded, but while her eyes seemed to be inspecting the fluffy clouds in the sky, Sai knew that she was actually deep in thought.

"That's a good place to start," she smiled cheekily.

"You know of more that I need to work on?"

"Maybe," she sang out in a teasing manner, not willing to elaborate anymore. "I have to go meet Ino for lunch, but we can start tomorrow. Be at the Paper Lantern at ten?" She only waited for the slightest nod before jogging down the path that led back to Konoha.

Sai knew what he was feeling; happy, and maybe a bit of satisfaction (the kind he normally got when learning a new jutsu or kicking Naruto's butt in a sparing match especially hard) because he _knew_ what he was feeling.

Tomorrow at ten o'clock, Sai would begin his quest to sensitivity.

. . .

Had Sai known ahead of time what he was getting into, he would have given in to his urge to stay home on the chilly day and paint. Naruto had once called him a recluse, but it was something familiar that made him feel comfortable. _This_ terrible place, was the opposite of comfortable.

"What do you want?" The hoarse voice of the overweight waitress clashed horribly with the sickly sweet colors that surrounded them. The woman stood with one hip jutted out to the side and a dull look that said this place had gotten to her a long time ago.

"Nothing." The woman raised an eyebrow and she lowered the pad of paper and pen from it's 'ready' position.

"You need to order something or give the table up to someone who will," she said shortly, bringing her pad and pen back up so that she could jot down his order. Apparently, she hadn't noticed the total lack of customers, and the many tables that were open should the shop suddenly gain popularity.

"My friend will be here soon. She'll order something for the both of us." The woman didn't seem to appreciate this answer much more than the last one (if the added stomp to her step was any indication), but she left to tend to the other few customers who dared to enter the overly-frilly store. The unopened menu still sat before him, but he hadn't wanted to touch it to find out exactly what the Paper Lantern sold.

Sai turned away from the irritated waitress and tilted his head in the palm of his hand so that he could watch people walk through the street outside. Well, specifically, he was watching for a pink-haired girl to come so that he could focus his attention on something other than the horrifically pink-lacy table cloth or the rude waitress, and the general _pinkness_ of everything in the store.

"Sai?" He had heard the ridiculous bells over the door jingle (signaling someone's entrance to the store) but since Sai didn't have interest in people who frequented this particular place – aside from Sakura, he concluded – he had ignored it and opted to watching the crowd just outside the window. "What are you doing in here?"

Naruto slid into the seat opposite him, and the wide smile on his face said that he thought this entire thing was hysterical, which only served to deepen Sai's frown.

"I'm waiting for someone," Sai said, turning his attention away from the boy in front of him, whose eyebrow had shot up at his short response.

"Who?" Naruto asked incredulously; he didn't believe him.

Sai debated just telling him, but by the look on his face, Sai decided to, as Yamato called it, "_mess with him_", and refused to answer directly.

"What are you doing here, Naruto?" Sai asked, watching as the very corner of Naruto's eyebrow twitched before his expression seemed to relax.

"I was walking over to ask Sakura if she wanted to train with me today since Yamato canceled on us." Naruto grabbed the menu from in front of Sai and flipped it open, only to frown, quirk his head to the side and set it back down, looking like his vast appetite had escaped him. "Who are you meeting here? Wait, no, let me guess."

Naruto leaned forward and studied Sai, whose expression had been schooled into something far less expressive than Naruto's.

"It's Ino, isn't it? Only she would pick a place like this. What's with that waitress, anyway-?"

"It's not Ino," Sai interrupted, turning back to watch the crowd for a more appealing shade of pink than what surrounded them.

"Then who is it?" Naruto let out a huff of air when Sai ignored him and watched as a woman chased her child through the crowd, effectively leaving her other child far behind.

"That's not really your business, Naruto." This seemed to irritate him more than merely ignoring his questions. He leaned back in his chair and folded his arms, giving Sai a glare that he easily brushed off.

"You're an idiot Sai. All I have to do is wait for whoever it is to show up." A small smile tugged at the corner of his mouth, like he wasn't able to suppress his satisfaction. It quickly slid away when Sai shrugged in response. "Fine, I'll wait."

They only had to sit in an awkward silence for another few minutes before Sai spotted the familiar head of pink hair bobbing through the crowd, making her way to the front door of the Paper Lantern. The door jingled and Sakura shrugged off a coat and placed it on the rack by the door, walking straight past the already irritated waitress.

"Sakura! What are you doing here?" Naruto asked, his scowl immediately being replaced with a smile. She gave Naruto an odd look, but politely smiled at him.

"I'm meeting Sai. Sorry I'm late," she turned her attention to Sai. "I had the opportunity to sleep in a bit since Tsunade-sama told me to take a personal day of rest and I couldn't resist."

"_You're_ the one meeting Sai here?" Naruto asked, sending Sai another scowl. "He's not blackmailing you, is he?"

"Of course not, idiot," Sakura said, pushing Naruto playfully out of his seat so that she could sit down. "It was my idea to meet here." At this, Naruto scrunched up his nose as if he had smelled something bad and looked around the room, earning a glare from the waitress who was leaning heavily on the counter.

"But I wanted to ask if you'd train with me today since Yamato gave us the day off," Naruto whined, leaning against the window and crossing his arms, his pout only amplifying the childishness of his whining.

"I'm busy today, Naruto. If Yamato-taicho cancels tomorrow, how about then?" Naruto seemed to brighten up a little bit at that. "I heard that Hinata is looking for someone to spar with since Neji went on that month-long mission. Why don't you ask her? I saw her a few blocks away on my way here."

"Okay, I'll see you guys tomorrow." Naruto left with a wave, smiling brightly at the waitress who only seemed to glare back at him as the bells jangled over the door.

"What do you want?" the waitress asked, appearing beside their table with her hip jutting out to one side and taking in Sakura's appearance with an overly critical eye. Sakura snatched up the menu that Naruto had tossed down and quickly read through it.

"We'll have a pot of the Specialty Tea of the day and a tray of cinnamon cookies," Sakura said with a pleasant smile, handing the menu over to the unenthusiastic waitress who jotted down the order and muttered something about having it right up.

"What's the Specialty Tea of the day?" Sai asked when the woman was out of earshot.

Sakura shrugged. "I'm not sure, I think it's just black tea with some extra spices this week. Their cinnamon cookies are really good, though."

"You come here on a regular basis?" Sai asked, watching as Sakura glanced around with a pleasant smile on her face. This place didn't appear unappealing to her, as it had to Naruto and Sai, and assumingly everyone else in the village save for an older couple sitting in a corner booth.

"Usually with Ino or my mom, but lately Ino's been obsessed with this new tea shop on the other side of the village, sort of by the civilian district." She fixed Sai with a calculating look that seemed to morph into a smile right before his eyes. "You're getting better at this small-talk thing. Have you been practicing?"

"A little bit. I tried talking to a woman at a fruit stand yesterday and she didn't slap me," Sai said with a satisfied smile.

"Wow, impressive. Talk about some improvement." Sakura laughed and seemed to notice that she was laughing a little too loudly when the waitress gave a throaty cough and sent their table a vicious glare. She quieted down until her shoulders were barely shaking. "What did you talk about? The bruised fruit or the ripe-ones?" That, Sai noticed, was a playful jab.

"No. We talked about a book she was carrying; _Basic Self Defense for Civilians._"

Sakura smiled and made a small humming noise that Sai had learned to associate with approval. "You're definitely making improvement, though. I can tell." Her voice had taken on an air of seriousness; she was no longer poking fun at him.

"Here's your cookies and tea," the waitress grumbled, setting the cookies on the table between them hard enough to shake the table. Sakura thanked the woman and smiled politely, though in Sai's opinion the woman didn't deserve a thank you.

After pouring the both of them a cup of tea, the woman left to go stand by the counter.

"So, let's get down to business." Sakura may have appeared more business-like if she didn't have a mouthful of cinnamon cookies. Sai hesitantly grabbed one and inspected it; it didn't look like the waitress had poisoned them, so he took a small bite. "You want to learn to be sensitive?"

"Basically, yes."

"Why?" The question caught him off guard, and he realized that he was now being watched closely by his teammate.

"What do you mean?" Sai asked after a moment of merely blinking at Sakura and watching as her pink eyebrows slowly rose, waiting for an answer.

"I mean, why do you want to learn to be sensitive?" Sakura asked, appearing to be a little exasperated, meaning that she was likely on to the fact that Sai was stalling for time to think about the question and come up with a respectable answer.

Sai thought hard for a moment and busied himself with eating another cookie and drinking half of his tea. There was a small smile on Sakura's face; yep, she was definitely on to him, but was willing to let him squirm around for a bit before forcing him to answer.

"I guess...I don't want to be beaten up by you?" Sai said slowly, watching Sakura's reaction for any hint that he should run for the hills. The waitress's head snapped in his direction and she gave the two of them an odd look, but seemed to deem it not her business and she turned her back on them.

Sakura's smile widened in a slightly off-putting manner. She seemed to like that he admitted she could hurt him easily. "That's a nice answer, but not really what I'm looking for."

"What kind of answer are you looking for?" Sai asked, watching as Sakura tilted her head back and chewed her cookie thoughtfully.

"Something closer to the truth, I guess." She sent him a knowing smile that put him more on edge than the vicious glare that the waitress had sent them. "You're lying, and I know it."

"No I'm not. I don't wish to be beaten up by you for saying the wrong thing," Sai lied easily through his teeth, sending his own faked smile that he knew would either irritate her or make her as uneasy as he felt.

It didn't have the intended effect, though, and Sakura only continued to smile politely at him, her eyes curving in something that reminded him of Kakashi-sensei as she sipped her tea. "If that was all you wanted, you would have asked me to help you learn what to say, when. You didn't ask that, though," she flashed a confident smile at him. "You wanted help learning to _be_ sensitive. There's got to be a better reason for that other than not wanting me to kick your ass-"

"You don't "_kick my ass_"," Sai defended, feeling, as Naruto had once put it, that his 'ego had taken a hit'. Sakura quirked a delicate pink eyebrow and her smile faded only a fraction of a bit.

"I kick your ass," she reiterated, leaving no room for argument with her disarmingly sweet smile and the way her head tilted just a little bit to the left. "Anyway, I won't make you answer that right now. But I am still curious about why you asked _me_ to help you with this. I know Ino was furious that you didn't ask her."

"Ino?" Sai asked, thinking for a moment and going over the many reasons why he hadn't wanted to ask her. "I don't enjoy talking to her. She asks me to go out to dinner with her and I don't like it."

Sakura chuckled and shook her head to herself, smiling around her cup of tea and keeping the delicate, light pink cup just a few inches away from her lips as she spoke. "You're one of a kind, Sai. Turning down a beautiful girl and not liking being hit on is something of a rarity."

He wasn't sure how to respond to that, so he grabbed another cookie from the plate between them and took a few small bites.

"So, how do you want to go about this?" Sakura asked, but continued when Sai gave her one of his blanker expressions, if that were possible. "Learning to be sensitive. You do know what the word means, right?"

"Of course. It's the ability to be susceptible to the attitudes, feelings, or circumstances of others." If it sounded as if he was reading the definition from a book, it was probably because he had memorized it when he was first aware of his lack of sensitivity.

"Okay, but what does that mean?"

"I feel as if you're talking in circles. I just told you what it means."

Sakura let out an exasperated sigh and set her cup of tea on the table with a roll of her eyes. "You told me what you read about it. You just want to "be susceptible to the attitudes, feelings, or circumstances of others"?" Sakura asked with a slightly incredulous look sent his way.

"Yes."

"Do you even know what that means?" She raised one eyebrow at him and tilted her head back to finish off her tea.

"Yes," Sai answered again, feeling a little less confident in his answer by the way Sakura's green eyes were staring at him so intently.

"So, what do you want to be able to do with your new-found sensitivity?" The left corner of Sakura's mouth was drawn up just a fraction of an inch more than the right; she was trying not to smile, even though her eyes gave away any feelings she was trying to hide.

"Not be beaten up?" Sai guessed with a forced smile.

Sakura rolled her eyes again and whatever smile she was trying to hide came to the surface. She laughed – once again, loud enough to earn a glare from the large waitress. "Close enough for now," she decided, pouring another cup of tea for herself and topping off Sai's own cup.

"Okay, so you're going to have to bear with me on this. I don't exactly have experience in teaching sensitivity. Well, aside from Naruto from time to time, but that's beside the point." She waved her hand flippantly in the air as if pushing the subject away. "This is new territory for me too," she added when Sai merely watched her with an ever-expressionless face.

"So, how do we start?" Sai watched as Sakura grabbed the last of the cinnamon cookies and tilted her head to the side to watch some people walk past the store.

"I'm not entirely sure," she admitted after a moment. "I guess we should figure out what you want to accomplish with this. Aside from not getting your ass kicked by me," Sakura raised an eyebrow in a challenging manner when Sai opened his mouth to defend himself again, "why do you want to be sensitive?"

"Do I have to answer this honestly?" Sai asked, feeling the uneasy way that his stomach seemed to want to reject the cookie he had just eaten. That had been called butterflies in a book once, Sai recalled.

Sakura hummed and nodded, tucking a piece of pink hair back behind her ear. "The honest one would be best."

"I don't enjoy hurting your feelings on a semi-regular basis." Sai found himself looking out the window, if only to avoid the fact that he wasn't sure what Sakura's reaction would be.

"Sai," Sakura said, her voice having dropped in volume in an almost disbelieving way. "That's really sweet."

He chanced a glance in her direction to see that she was smiling, but it wasn't the vibrant smile that meant he was about to get his ass kicked. It was more subdued, but he wasn't sure what that meant.

"Okay, so we'll start with that," Sakura seemed to recover quickly and took a long sip of her tea. "You don't want to hurt my feelings. I guess to start off you need to understand what people want."

"How will that help?" Sai asked, unsure if this was the right path to learning to understand a new emotion.

"Well, if you can understand that someone wants something, you can cater to those needs to make them feel better," Sakura explained easily, as if it was something she had known since she could remember. It made Sai feel surprisingly inadequate, which was something he wasn't entirely used to yet.

Sai let out a small hum, something that he realized he had picked up from Sakura. "Is that why you call Yamato, Yamato-taicho?"

Sakura smiled brightly and nodded in approval. "That's a great example. I know that Yamato-taicho wants to be a part of the team and accepted by us. While you and Naruto refuse to accept him as our team leader, it makes him feel more like part of the team if we acknowledge him as our team captain."

"So, it would be sensitive of me to acknowledge him as my captain as well?" Sai questioned, watching as Sakura tilted her head just a fraction of an inch to the side.

"Yes, it would. It would probably make him feel a lot better, and less like we're trying to keep him outside of our little circle." Sakura smiled idly, appearing to be pleased with how well Sai was coping with understanding this.

"Why hasn't Naruto realized this?" Sai asked, watching as Sakura's smile dropped just a bit.

"Naruto wouldn't know sensitivity if it bashed him over the head," Sakura said, her voice dropping an octave and her eyes darkened just a bit. She didn't approve, Sai quickly gathered.

"Would you like another pot of tea?" the waitress asked, looking as if she was hoping they would say no so that she could walk away.

"Sure. Another Specialty Tea of the day, please," Sakura said, her voice containing none of the irritation it once held just moments ago. She smiled brightly at the woman who managed to return something that looked like a grimace of pain...that, or an attempted grin.

Sai stifled his urge to smile at his teammate. Sakura tended to have an effect on people that Sai couldn't even begin to understand.

"So, if I understand what someone wants, I can be sensitive?" Sai asked, moving their pot of tea out of the way so that the waitress could put the new pot on their table. He handed the faded pink pot to the waitress, who attempted to grimace at him as she grabbed it.

"It's the best place to start, I think," Sakura handed the woman the plate of cookie crumbs and thanked her politely. Once the waitress was out of earshot, Sakura placed her elbows on the table and leaned forward to speak in a lowered voice. "What do you think that waitress wants?"

"To have a better job?" Sai asked, taking in the general appearance of the overly pink and frilly tea-shop once more.

Sakura chuckled. "Most likely, but right this minute. What do you think she wants that you can help her get?" Sai watched the woman closely as she walked over to the older couple sitting quietly in the corner booth of the shop. "Stop thinking so hard. If you were working this job, something demeaning in an environment you probably don't like, what would you want from the customers that come in?"

"Can I have a hint?" Sai asked, causing Sakura to chuckle and glance over to look at the waitress again.

"The last time I was in here with Ino, I saw her receive what was probably the lowest possible tip a customer could give her from a rude group of older woman at the table beside ours."

"So she wants a bigger tip?" Sai guessed, raising an eyebrow in an incredulous manner. It couldn't possibly be that simple.

"Something like that. But the tip wasn't only the problem. Imagine being a genin again-"

"I never held the rank of genin," Sai interrupted.

Sakura rolled her eyes, made a motion as if to brush him aside with her hand, and continued anyway. "Okay, so I'll explain it to you. You get the worst missions ever thought up; digging up potatoes, pulling weeds, chasing pigs around farms and trying to learn how to coordinate as a team. All the while, your work is never appreciated because it's such low-brow work."

"That sounds horrible," Sai commented with a smile, feeling a little glad that he hadn't experienced that while in Root.

"Yeah, well...," Sakura trailed off for only a moment. "Imagine having to go through that day in and day out, and not being appreciated for any task you do, no matter how little."

"That...doesn't sound great," Sai concluded, glancing up to see the waitress leaning against the counter again with a frown set deep on her face.

"So, what is something you can do right now to make her feel as if this little job she's doing is appreciated?"

"Be...nice?" Sai guessed, watching Sakura's face warily for any hint that he was going in the wrong direction.

She leaned back in her chair and smiled widely, clapping her hands together in an impersonation of Yamato whenever a mission went exceptionally well. "Very good. See? You're getting the hang of this."

"But it's not very natural," Sai said, observing the way that the waitress's frown had lessened up just a little bit. How was it that Sakura was able to assess the woman's needs and wants in a matter of seconds and figure out the best way to make her feel appreciated? Sai was barely able to do that while being lead through the situation like a blinded child.

"None of this is natural at first," Sakura commented sympathetically. "I remember my mom having to scold me when I would say something brash or insensitive. You'll get the hang of it soon, don't worry."

"So, you'll kind of be my mom?" Sakura's eyes narrowed and her eyebrows pulled together just a bit, which was his only warning before her boot collided sharply with his shin.

"Bad son," she scolded, smiling crookedly despite herself.


End file.
